i don't want to sleep tonight, just want to think of you.
Finals officially started a few hours ago and mine's at 7:15AM, just a few hours from now and that I should get as much rest as possible. But yet I'm here writing this.
It's been so long.
Someone had asked me a few days ago. That song has started shuffling again on my iPod. The scent of Sparkling Peach passed by me, and I actually turned around and looked.
I loved her so much, maybe too much that I upset her. Maybe because I care so much in our future that I tried so hard to perfect it rather than enjoy it. Maybe because I need to be the stable lover. Maybe because love is important to me, too important that I worry about her live way over mine. I would prioritize my career, life and goal after her. Although I might not seem to show it, and I don't need to show it... because I know what I need to do to protect her substantially by my side. Everything that she needs, art, music, graphic, science, health, list goes on. If there was one aspect of me that was flawed beyond repair, I'd personally destroy myself. I don't know how substantial I could ever be if all my potentials and independency aren't enough to love her.
And then, she broke me. Shattered my heart into pieces. I lost touch in life. And that's when life hit me with a brick. I lost my place to live. I got attacked. Caught a fever and ended up in the hospital for a few days. All this time, life was bitter. But although I was rejected, I was still in love. It kept me living and fend me off of any conclusive decision because that'd no only not end the prolonging pain but the very little remaining feeling of love. I'd rather retain and live 95 percent of my day in pain and bitter, with 5% of lovely memories than end it with nothing
"I LOVE you. but too afraid to admit it most of the time. which is also the reason why i was so out of hand today. maybe i ought say it to you more often.
=^_^= purr"
I love you, my love,
but you don't know need to know
Guess, I'll be spending the first Christmas all by myself. Have a Merry Christmas everyone.
I ordered this like on 3-22. Since it was a Sat, samedaymusic shipped it on Monday(3-24) and here's where the night mares begin.
UPS arrived at Joe West(the one and only mail building for all SJSU students). It arrived like 3 times but the hours for Joe West is between 12-3PM due to Spring Break. So...yeaa I could've gotten by M-Audio 49 piano on Tuesday and it's Sunday right now.
This video got my roommate to wonder how I was laughing so hysterically.
XD